I have
been
holding lit cigarettes between my fingers
hoping to feel the burnt of my heart in my lungs
I have
been
trying to forget the smell that lingers
hoping to forget how heavenly you felt in my toungue
I have
been
walking leaving a trial of ashes behind wherever I go
hoping that you would somehow come across it someday
I have
been
the biggest idiot on the face of earth
and the most magniloquent blind person
for when I looked behind
even I could not find my trial
the ashes
seemed to have been blown away with the wind
just like your never ending
shallow
promises.